Normally when people stress the importance of being “equally yoked” with a romantic partner, they’re referring to the need to have an equal stature in life. You know, like Beyonce and Jay-Z. In human terms, this most notably refers to each person’s money-making potential. But this term is also in the Bible (our reference most definitely came from it but of course we’ve twisted the meaning) and refers to a likeness in faith and purity of heart. And it applies to all the company we keep-not just the romantic ones.
I think its most important to spend your time with people who feel good about themselves and are constantly on a journey for self-improvement whether that be emotionally, financially or spiritually. Being in a relationship with or married to a person who lacks faith means you’re unequally yoked. Having a negative friend who can’t ever see the bigger picture means you’re unequally yoked. And I’m not just talking faith in a higher power but faith in their own capabilities. Low self-esteem leads to an array of problems in a relationship- abuse, cheating, boredom, dissatisfaction- making it the number one relationship deal breaker. Just ask Jesse James, Sandra Bullock’s ex, who is now pleading his case on the media circuit.
Just after Bullock took home the Oscar for Best Actress for her role in The Blind Side, news broke that her husband had been cheating on her with a tattoo artist. James admits that he threw the marriage away, that he had a lot of demons stemming from childhood abuse and basically felt that he was unlovable.
“I grew up with a huge amount of shame and fear and abandonment on my shoulders from a very young age and I think, you know, the way my mind rationalized [cheating], ‘Well, you know, I might as well do whatever I can to like run her off cause she is going to find out what I am anyway and leave me anyway,'” the biker, 41, said in a Nightline interview that aired Tuesday. “The struggle within myself for the things that I did …to damage marriage and my life and everything else, it’s all me. I’m doing it because, you know, I’ve basically never felt good enough for anyone.”
Whomp. Whomp. If he loved her so much he should have gone to therapy to deal with his issues before his shortcomings embarrassed her on a national level. Bottom line? If someone doesn’t love and respect themselves how do you expect them to be any good to you?
A Certain Beauty 